1. No Roof, No Sense.

    I may have publicly cogitated on this matter on occasion, but I just saw a forklift flatten a stop sign and leave it for dead while hauling a megalithic frond in a hot tub potter. And the cross breeze just tried to take my squiggly air plant to the prom. So, as Milk D once said, apparently for the hell of it: What. The heck.*

    Back in 198___, when I (Had a Driver's License), I watched the Dynamic Three torpedo the Charlotte Park Center for two songs. As you can see, the flyer hasn't crumbled into hot pink pharoah dust, just yet.

    Thank you Vogue Club of Olympic High.

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    Then I saw them at Carowinds Palladium, near the PTL Ministries' wave pool in Fort Mill, SC. People fled for shelter once the lightning tried to split the difference. But we stood out there like fools because, shit really, how many chances are you gonna have to see Rockmaster Scott & the Dynamic Three do "Request Line" and “Roof Is On Fire” at an amusement park in South Carolina? Then the rain started drilling but they kept at it, in leather, while the remaining 15 or so of us stood on our seats in the downpour, a bunch of wet muskrats chanting, "We don't need no water... etc.", like we'd just invented irony, harf, because no fire worth a damn would be caught out in this mess. But we’d just spotted the Real Roxanne in her painted-on Guess floral with the zipper cuffs, so we were feeling pretty optimistic. Check with your local meteorologist.

    *He really did say it like that.

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    • http://nessdigi.podomatic.com ernesto

      dope x 3

    • iKnowTANK

      dope article. I'm from Charlotte and I love this site.