1. Happy Birthday, Prince.

    Happy 53rd Birthday, Prince Rogers Nelson. You are definitely one of the world’s “Favorite Blacks.” We know this not because of all the joy your music has brought your millions of fans. But because in 1985 you and your band, the Revolution, were presented the honor “Favorite Black Album” at the American Music Awards (by Huey Lewis and Madonna, no less). The irony of this is that you didn’t even win that award for your raw-as-hell The Black Album (which didn’t come out till a few years later and scared all your pop fans who never heard Dirty Mind ; we had to buy that shit on a bootleg cassette behind the counter at an 8th Street head shop like it was contraband). You won it for Purple Rain . Maybe that’s why you let Wendy do all the talking during the acceptance speech: you were too busy thinking to yourself, “Holy guacamole, do I have a ‘Black Album’ planned for you, suckaz…”



    Sorry hip-hop kinda fucked up your career for a minute. Rappers today can’t carry your purple jock. Now and forever, you rock.


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